Heals The Original Dryness

NeeliaBuzz: ...fuck you
NeeliaBuzz: i've had a hard day
DaMadFiddler: heh
DaMadFiddler: how did rehearsal go?
NeeliaBuzz: went well, we did a stumble through of the show
DaMadFiddler: and how did it go?
DaMadFiddler: stumbly?
NeeliaBuzz: i got home in a good mood and everything, but like talking to my friend in palo alto i was having like an old regrets resurgence, and talking about benn moving away didn't help and i just kinda broke down cause everything was feeling so shitty and my life was shit and why the fuck do i even bother
DaMadFiddler: oh, dear.
NeeliaBuzz: so i dragged benn upstairs so i could talk and cry on his shoulder and then we talked a bit more about the possibilty of him appealng and things like that, and just reminding me of why he wants to do these things and how much better of a situation we are in than his last long distance relationship
DaMadFiddler: <- [senses tremendous amounts of emotional insecurity]
NeeliaBuzz: ya think?
DaMadFiddler: You've got a good guy. Don't throw him away.
NeeliaBuzz: i wasn't planning on it
DaMadFiddler: okay...you just sounded really...odd when you were talking about it earlier.
DaMadFiddler: on an unrelated note: Sean says "my conversation with Aileen was pretty fuckin' dumb. Why do I do these things?"
NeeliaBuzz: i just really don't trust myself and i see myself as extremely weak and i'm not looking forward to the quite possible depression. but talking with benn about it helped, cause he's much more optemistic about the situation, and thinks it'll work out fine
NeeliaBuzz: yes.. yes it was
NeeliaBuzz: i think we tried having a serious conversation once and it just didn't work....
DaMadFiddler: heh...
DaMadFiddler: ...so did the talk help you feel any better about things?
NeeliaBuzz: totally
NeeliaBuzz: if nothing else it got stuff out of my system and kind got us back on track with where the other is and like figuring out a game plan for whats coming up, stuff like that
DaMadFiddler: well, that's good.
NeeliaBuzz: it was good
DaMadFiddler: <- [makes stupid-face] Decent communication seems like it might be just a little bit important in a serious relationship.
NeeliaBuzz: well DUH
NeeliaBuzz: yeah, we really hadn't had a good discussion on the topic cause we've been hurting so much about it, and tonght i was just like "i'm falling apart here. whats happening on your side
NeeliaBuzz: and just needing to get stuff out of my system and have someone listen and stuff
NeeliaBuzz: anyway, doing better now but yes, i've had a rough evening

note on conversation with sean: i have been unofficially ordained as a table slut. don't ask. the conversation degraded to hurling medical terms at each other and just basically going "you fucker!"
ah college...